Juvenile Affection – Is This Love?

Hi readers. This is Krishna from near the Manchester of South India. I’m an aspiring entrepreneur. These memories were from my life narrated as precisely as I remember. It’s quite emotional and affectionate and no sex involved.

Coming to the story. It was when I was a teenager. Due to certain issues, my family has to shift places often and I wasn’t schooled consistently for more than 3 years at a place. Well, I didn’t know I’m gonna have some serious life lessons in this period of time.

We shifted to a new place and joined in a new school for 12th grade. As I’m the only son my parents took extra care of me. I was literally pampered towards education like a typical late 90’s kid.

Its been 3 months now, usually I’m quite shy about talking to girls. But I got acquainted with a girl Ganga (name changed) of the same class. She was the topper and class leader and I’m the first among. She was quite a silent girl and she talks to me only whenever necessary and so do I.

This went on for the next 3 months and the annual day and sports day came together. I was a decent volleyball player and she was good at Kho-Kho. We represented two different groups in our school. During practice, all the playfields were close.

The volleyball service often entered their court. Due to the force, a girl got hit on the head and fainted. That’s when Ganga lost her patience and started shouting at me. As I’m the only person she talks and that hurt my manly feelings. I replied in a harsh way either. And after that, we didn’t talk for a month or so.

Now it’s half-yearly exam time. The scenario was its half working day and one exam per day. I had two close friends from my school living near my home Syed and Kanak. As Syed had a viral fever I went to his home for a group study to help him study.

While I return at night my mom asked me to buy some grocery. So I went to the shop near-by. It started raining while I was in the grocery shop. I was stuck there. I saw another scooter coming towards the shop for shade. It was Ganga with her dad. We didn’t talk as if we were complete strangers.

Slowly the rain subsided to sprinkles. When they decided to leave, she called by my name and introduced me to her dad as a classmate. He was surprised at first but came to his senses and shook hands with me. Moreover, he offered me to drop me at home as I was with luggage because the rain may start again.

I denied formally, thinking how he could take both of us together. She read my mind and she told her father that she could stand in front of the scooter. (She was short). Her father had a smile watching our conversation and readily agreed. I didn’t have a choice either as it’s getting late already (9:30 PM almost).

I nodded and guided him to my home. I thanked him shyly and ran to my home on the 1st floor never turned back. I lied to my parents that Kanak’s dad dropped me and went to bed. I couldn’t sleep for the next one hour as I felt something unusual or different.

Next morning I was waiting for the school bus. I surprised to see Ganga in the bus stand standing with her dad. Her dad waved at me, I went up to him and had a formal chat about school and stuff. I came to know they shifted their home in the area where I live and her dad owns a retail shop for milk products.

Later my friends came, I exchanged a smile with him and went to them. It was my favorite exam that day, ‘Biology. I did well and was discussing the answer with my friends outside my bus. I saw Ganga getting on the bus and never bothered. One of my friends started commenting

Kanak: Why this dumb drum entered our bus today?

His voice was like a speaker and as not much crowd was there. I thought she might have heard it but I couldn’t stop laughing at the way he commented.

Me: Yea, she is supposed to come in our route bus hereafter it seems. I saw her morning entering the bus at my stop.

Later seeing her face I understood she felt really bad as he commented on her physique. I wanted to talk to her but again my ego stopped me. Later after coming home, I lost all the excitement of doing well the exams.

I felt really bad for her. I decided to apologize to her at least for the sake of her father being nice to me. Next day (Friday) I went as usual to the bus stand. She was standing alone today. I decided this is the best time to talk to her.

I went to her and straight away said, “Sorry for Kanak’s comments on you yesterday.” I guess she didn’t expect that and she said, “It’s ok,” With a surprise. After a few minutes of pause, she again told me, “Anything can become a trend if people like it.”

Then I realized she was not feeling bad about him for making the comments but she felt bad on me laughing to such comments. I again apologized to her, “I’m sorry too.” She didn’t look at me for some time and told it’s ok facing the opposite side.

Then I realized my friends coming from a distance. So I maintained my distance from her and pretended as if nothing happened. But since that day I kept an eye on her wherever she was.

It was just an English exam that day, a lot to write basically. So we were tired and we decided to spend some time in the afternoon on the video games. The next exam was on Monday.

After the video games, I realized that Ganga’s dad shop was near the spot. So I just thought of visiting him to get some buttermilk and paneer for myself and home. Fortunately or unfortunately, her dad was not there but she was there and I didn’t expect it.

The conversation went a lot similar as follow:
Me: Where is your dad?
Ganga: He went out to get stocks from Coimbatore.
Me: Ok, so the shop is closed now?

Ganga: Yes, but If you need anything from what is available you can take it.
Me: Ok, do you have paneer and buttermilk?
Ganga: Yea wait let me get them.
(Paneer was packed as usual but buttermilk was in loose.)

Me: Its ok paneer is enough, looks like the buttermilk is for your own use.
Ganga: Yea but its ok. I don’t know to pack buttermilk properly, so you can take it with the container and return it later.
Me: Buttermilk is for me to drink only but are you sure is it really ok if I drink which is for your own use cuz later your mom may scold you.

Ganga: (laughed) It’s ok, no one will scold me, you drink.
Since I liked it very much, I drank it completely and asked how much for both.
Ganga: It’s Rs 50.
Me: For both?? So cheap?

Ganga: It’s just for paneer since buttermilk is not for sale.
Me: But you gave it to me.
Ganga: yea, since you came to my home for the 1st time. It’s a custom to give something to drink or eat and you asked for buttermilk so I gave.
Me: Thanks.

Now I started feeling a little comfortable with her.
Me: (out of curiosity) Did your mom also go with your dad?
Ganga: (after thinking) Yea, she did.
Me: Ok bye, thanks again.
After that, I had a warm feeling for her and we used to smile at each other whenever our eyes met.

Saturday

My parents went out of station for some function. My friends had a non-veg party at Syed’s home and they invited me. As it was Saturday we usually don’t eat non-veg. As my parents were not home I can’t leave the house as they would scold me if they came to know.

Due to some transport issues, my parents decided to stay the night at the place where they went. As that was my first day alone at home at night. They often called me and checked on me. They arranged food for me by calling the near-by hotel.

As we were regular customers, they asked me to come over and have dinner. I went there, had food. While returning, I saw Ganga’s dad was standing near a tree. I went and thought of greeted him and realized he was heavily drunk and waiting there with no hope.

I was literally shocked as it was the first time I ever encountered a drunk guy in real life. I was scared but I felt I can’t just leave him there. I searched his wallet and got his home phone number. I called the number from the hotel reception and Ganga was at the receiving end.

Her voice was like she was worried and even was surprised to hear from. I explained the situation and surprised to know their home was just the shop. I stopped thinking much and asked her whether she has money to settle auto-cab and the answer was positive.

I took him in the auto-cab and once we reached her home, he started vomiting all over the entrance. We settled the auto-cab. We took him inside to the bathroom and she asked me to hold his head under the tap. I did the same. He started vomiting more which was stinking like hell.

She took some mildly hot water and started cleaning the entrance while the vomiting continued in the bathroom. Once she was done there, she came back and removed his shirt, pant and poured hot water on his head as well. I was simply standing there witnessing all this, with millions of questions inside my head.

Slowly he started coming to his senses but still in a hangover. She was drying her dad’s body and head with a towel while I was watching. He was often fainting. She started rubbing his hands and leg palms and drying with towel alternatively.

I came to my senses and decided to help her and started rubbing his palms while she dried his hair. Once he started moving often she ran to the kitchen and got some lemon juice for him. He drunk it and slept on the floor as such with a big snore.

I was still in shock and the first thing I asked her.
Me: Where is your mom?
Ganga: She died of blood cancer and it was her 4th anniversary today.

Shock after another shock and I was standing like a statue, thinking about her situation.

Ganga: Thanks a lot for the help. You can go to your home now, your parents will be worried about you.

I’m surprised to see her as if she was expecting all this, except me bringing her dad home. Especially no teardrops yet. Her face was as if she got accustomed to these events.

Me: My parents are not at the home. They will come tomorrow evening only. I have decided to be here in your home. Don’t say anything.

She started arguing with me.
Ganga: No you are not staying here, I can take care of things here, thanks a lot for your help till now.
Me: I said don’t say anything.

Ganga: Who are you to order me around, it is my house and I’m asking you to go out of it. Aren’t you man enough to understand it?
Me: Look. I’m here for the sake of my friend (pointing towards her dad). You are not the one paying the rent for this house, and he is the one who does it. So if you don’t like my presence you go to your room and lock yourself in. I really don’t care.

Now she started crying.
Ganga: I beg you please go. I want to be alone with my dad.
Me: Not happening, if you want to be alone with your dad fine then, let me sleep in the verandah.
I started moving and lay down in the verandah.

After 1 hour or so it’s almost 11:00 pm she came and called me in.
Ganga: Please don’t tell this to any of your friends.
Me: Don’t worry, I won’t.
Ganga: Thanks, you sleep on the cot inside. I will sleep next to my dad on the floor.
Me: Wake me up if you need anything.

After some time, I heard her crying silently.
Me: Are you crying?
Ganga: No, maybe I was just talking in my sleep. I have that habit.
Me: You may think I feel pity for you. What I really feel is you are really something superior to us.

Ganga: You don’t have to say anything more to me. I can understand what you really are, just with your actions.
Ganga just wiped her tears and went back to sleep.
Me: Goodnight Ganga.
Ganga: Good night Krishna.

Goodnight was just a word to end my conversation with her. But the reality is I was asking many more questions within myself. So is this the reason Ganga was not expressive to anybody?

But why can’t she just talk things out and make friends already? Maybe she feels like at some point of time friends may leave just like her mom and she was afraid of that feeling of separation.

The whole night I was just trying to comprehend about her myself and of course, I never knew when I slept.

Guess the story is long enough to be part 1 based on the response I would upload part 2. Public comments are welcome. You can connect with me at [email protected].